Jennifer and Her Big Fat Open Mouth Finally Go Home!

The picture that sent Jennifer home

I know America's Next Top Model is a bunch of crap. However, I still watch it and I still have favorites.

I liked Jennifer in the beginning. That was before I realized that she has one pose - - open mouthed. Every damn shot of Jennifer this season makes her look like a trout on the end of a fishing line. Is this high fashion nowadays? Or at least what ANTM wants us to think is fashion?

I honestly thought Jennifer and her mouth would win the whole thing. Tyra obviously loved her, open mouth, wonky eye and all. I believed she was in the Final Two for sure after Tyra said at panel that Jennifer's best shot was crap and she looked short and her face did nothing . . . but that Jennifer was sooooooo nice.

Tyra, since when does being nice have anything at all to do with taking a good PHO-to? That's right, nothing. If it was all about being nice, Naomi Campbell would never have had a career.

Thank God we won't have a repeat of last cycle when Tyra's obvious favorite Teyona(saurus) was pitted against Allison, who took much better PHO-tos than Teyona(saurus) and didn't break down crying during her Cover Girl ad due to nerves and whatever else, and yet Teyona(saurus) still managed to win. (I'm open to all conspiracy theories about that, by the way).

Now it's Nicole versus Laura . . . and either gal winning is okay by me.

Comments

Meet Melissa, the Queen Bridezilla

The lovely Melissa Photo Source: WETV.com So I was channel surfing last night and ended up having a good two (okay, maybe three) hours of my life drained by WE's bridal bitchfest Bridezillas . I realize the point of the show is to showcase what out of control hags some women are when planning their weddings but Miss Melissa really takes the cake. First, she claims to be 23 and I always find it interesting that most of these chicks look older than they claim to be. I'd like to see a birth certificate before I agree to that. She also claims to be in medical school, which is really funny considering (1) Melissa seems to have an awful lot of free time on her hands, to bitch, whine, complain and threaten to kill people and (2) for someone who claims to want a career saving lives, she sure talks about taking a lot of them. (Case in point: Melissa, concerned that she won't be happy with her wedding cake, tells the camera that if the baker screws it up, she will kill h

Lisa Cuddy: The Most Unprofessional Administrator of All Time

"When you bend over, I can see your IUD." Gregory House, M.D. Let me begin by saying I love House. I love Hugh Laurie. I love Wilson. I love Robert Sean Leonard. I don't, however, love Lisa Cuddy. I'm not sure where to begin but I know where it will always end up. Her fricking attire. Cuddy is supposed to be the administrator of a huge, well-respected hospital in Princeton, New Jersey. And yet she dresses in too tight skirts with too tight and too low cut blouses and sweaters like she's auditioning for a Hot for Teacher video. If I walked into a hospital and saw someone dressed like that I would assume either a) she's a stripper who suffered a slip and fall from the pole at work, b) she's an "enterprising" legal assistant/paralegal who is sleeping with her boss who is representing said stripper over the said slip and fall or c) she's a hospital receptionist who is looking to bag a wealthy doctor. Okay, maybe a bit extreme

Bitch, Please: Toddlers & Tiaras

Okay, so I watched Toddlers & Tiaras this week. Had heard about it, heard in the past that it was a pedophile's dream show, how they exploited kids, blah, blah, blah. I was channel surfing and there was nothing else on so I stopped. And watched. Stunned. Do parents like these really exist? WTF is wrong with them? And how on earth does a 2 month old baby win a pageant? The least amount of drool? Best pacifier? Carried the best by parent? I'm confused. But I digress. Apparently the format is that each episode follows several kids and their severely in need of therapy parental units as they prepare for and then compete in some type of child's beauty pageant, with the end of the show being the crowning of the winners. This episode of T&T begins with the unforunately named Brystol of Lexington, South Carolina who is 18 months old and has supposedly won top prize in every pageant she has competed in. Before you snort and wonder how many pageants she

Television Nirvana

Search This Blog