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| The lovely Melissa Photo Source: WETV.com |
First, she claims to be 23 and I always find it interesting that most of these chicks look older than they claim to be. I'd like to see a birth certificate before I agree to that. She also claims to be in medical school, which is really funny considering (1) Melissa seems to have an awful lot of free time on her hands, to bitch, whine, complain and threaten to kill people and (2) for someone who claims to want a career saving lives, she sure talks about taking a lot of them. (Case in point: Melissa, concerned that she won't be happy with her wedding cake, tells the camera that if the baker screws it up, she will kill her and eat her).
So . . . Melissa and her oh-so-whipped intended Chris had been dating all of four months when Chris decided that he had to have bitch and nag in his life permanently. I jest not. Melissa complains, name calls and shows nothing but contempt for the man she will soon be promising to love and honor until death do they part (likely his, given her verbal track record). Chris seems like a nice enough man who could certainly do better than this BOW (bitch on wheels) but I figure he must have suffered some terrible accident that resulted in the loss of his spine and testicles because I really have no other idea why he would be with Melissa.
We (me and the probably one other person watching this mess) are "treated" to Melissa screeching at Chris about his drawing abilities while Chris attempts to work on the reception seating chart and berating him while he glues rhinestones on to her wedding shoes. She also tells the camera that this will be her "first marriage" and hey, if it doesn't work out, they can always divorce. A ringing endorsement for their marriage, don't you think?
The best part of the two episode arc was the actually wedding. Many brides have a drink or two to steady their nerves but not Melissa! Homegirl starts tippling while her hair is getting done and she's so enraged over the cost of her makeup (hey, it's expensive to color up fugly) that she does a shot or twelve. No, okay, she doesn't actually do a shot until she's en route to her ceremony on a golf cart but before that she drinks like a dirty sailor on leave after a year at sea. Girlfriend is literally drunk by the time her sure to be embarrassed father walks her down the aisle . . . where she stumbles up to her awaiting groom and tells her maid of honor to "hold this shit", meaning her flowers. Nice! She is so completely intoxicated that I am surprised the minister married her. She slaps her groom's hands away when they are exchanging rings and when they are heading back down the aisle after Chris is pronounced Melissa's victim and bitch for life, she tells one of the ringbearers to move and get out of the way. The guests look appropriately horrified. It's one thing to tie one on during the reception but, really, what do you do when the bride shows up tanked before anyone else has a chance to take a drink?
Crazy Melissa cements the "drunk" label by loudly bellowing to her guests that they need to come in to the reception where there is free alcohol. Party! Again, the guests look appropriately horrified. And this woman is supposedly in medical school? Bitch, please.
During the confessional at the end, Bitchzilla is still relatively tanked, complains about the centerpieces, the flowers, rips off Chris' boutonniere, states they are married (duh!) and she has to wear a ring now (said with a deep sigh) and forewarns others to not do it. Probably good advice for Chris. Good luck there, buddy.
wonderful review!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI just watched this episode on netflix and I have to say that I've never had a doctor before with tattoos all over his/her hands & fingers like Melissa does, nor such a hateful personality. When I noticed all the tattoos and heard her say she was in medical school I decided not to judge her. But when her true white-trash character revealed itself, the way she talked to people, most specifically her fiancee and her mother, and made the comments about needing to drink and how she would kill people who dared ruin her wedding day, I had to go watch the beginning of the episode again to hear her say "I'm in medical school". I still don't believe it. She doesn't have an ounce of compassion for others in her - isn't that something required of the medical field? I dunno, maybe she has plans to work in a state prison someday. She'll fit right in.
ReplyDeleteI saw her recently on 'Bridezillas: Where Are They Now?", a TLC special where they followed up on some of the more memorable women from past seasons. In her follow-up interview she admitted that she's not really a medical student, she's actually pre-med, and then couldn't even remember what her major is until her fiance reminded her (cytology or microbiology or something like that). At the time that her 'Bridezillas' episode was filmed, she hadn't even started pre-med yet, so it took a lot of nerve for her to claim to be in med school. I'm a med student with tats-o-plenty and a fairly unconventional lifestyle and I can categorically state that tattoos and a stint on reality TV probably won't hurt her chances of a career in medicine. Being a f$#@ing idiot will, though. Seriously, did she actually say "expectially"? Good luck breaking 25 on your MCATs, bimbo.
ReplyDeleteGreat review. I just watched the episode on Netflix and I just had to google her because I, too, did not take her for a med student. Not because of her tattoos but because of the way she acts, didn't seem intelligent at all thank you for the follow up post that proves she is in fact a liar as well as a bitch. Her husband is an idiot and should really stick up for himself more, he seems to fear her which is disgusting. My fiancée treats me wonderfully but would also never let me walk, or trample, all over him. He actually caught bits and pieces of the episode as I was watching it and simply stated "I hate guys that allow that treatment towards themselves" what a coward! He seems like a nice guy that is going to spend a long time trying to make her happy, and failing, instead of being with someone much nicer who he could make happy.
ReplyDeleteMelissa was the most awful bridezilla of all time. Of all the husbands, I feel the most sorry for Chris. Thank you for the info that she is not a med student. I couldn't believe that either and it makes so much sense that she is not, and hopefully never will be, a doctor. Phew.
ReplyDeleteI went to high school with her! She's a bitch! She didn't lie about her age though but she is NOT in medical school. She went to keiser to become a phlebotomist, not sure if she ever finished.
ReplyDeleteThank you all for your updates on the Queen Bitchzilla! Melissa still gives me the heebie jeebies. I can't believe Chris is still married to her - - when you don't intro your family to your intended until the wedding, that's probably a sign. That you should at least keep a divorce attorney on speed dial.
ReplyDeleteHappy Valentine's Day!
To be perfectly honest, I think ALL of the Bridezillas need a good dose of poverty to humble themselves a little - whilst I understand that defeats the theme of this reality show; will they look back on these episodes as grandparents with pride or sheer embarrassment? Just wondering ..
ReplyDeleteI just watched the first episode and cringed as I saw her bitch out her fiancée for smoking and said she would divorce him if he got lung cancer. About her being a medical student, her teacher must be Leatherface because she is crazy... Why hasn't someone sent her ass to Antarctica in those damn shoes? She must have a rich family or SOMETHING!
ReplyDeleteI am very late to the Bridezillas show. I am enjoying the heck out of it! I love this review! I am LMAO!
ReplyDeleteI think the harsh light the producers use for filming makes all the people look old. I mean, Melissa looks 30 if she's a day.
As to Med School, not for all the Nopes that ever Noped in Nopeland. She may have been in Pre-Med training, but I seriously don't think Melissa is bringing the potato salad to the Mensa picnic this year if you know what I mean. I don't think she could pass the M-CAT.
And with her psychotic behaviors, I can't imagine her potential clients wanting her to be her doctor. I'd be too afraid she'd snap on me and give me a lobotomy when all I needed was a physical.
Plus she's a bimbat for threatening people on TV.
And Chris needs to nut up and grow a pair and stick up for himself. If the hen-pecking starts now, it will just get worse. That is abuse.
I can see where she would have a good career as a drug/alcohol counselor. It appeared that whenever anything didn't go to suit her, she got piss drunk. She really needs to address that. Because things will go wrong on the floor when she's a doctor (assuming she makes it, God help us all.) Patients will die, her attending will yell at her, she will make a mistake that could get someone killed and then have to explain it in a meeting called Morbidity & Mortality. If she drinks like this when she needs to know what she's doing at work, she could get people killed. That is the epitome of selfishness. She is a stupid, spoiled bimbat.
I don't think ink is a big whoop these days. Nor is being a reality star before going to school. However, making public threats and being a general jerkface may follow a person.
ReplyDeleteI can't get enough of this show. I have been watching a few episodes a night. I am sure my IQ has dropped 40 points, but I feel so much better about myself.